Ryan Phillippe is starring in the upcoming comedy film MacGruber, based on a popular ‘SNL’ skit. He talked with Women’s Health for their May issue about his hidden talent, his obsessions and how a woman can impress him.

Comedy is the way to making a good impression on him:

“Do something-anything- to make me laugh. If a woman is funny, that will leave an impression and stay on my brain. I like dark, intellectual wit. But no jokes about bodily functions. That’s not a turn-on for me.”

Ryan says the most important things a successful relationship needs:

“Unconditional love and patience. A lot of times, people are in a relationship with someone they’d love to grow old with, but things become tumultuous, and there’s so much that can divide you. That’s the challenge. I got married when I was 23; I’m 35 now [and divorced]. A lot of change can take place in that time. And actors are slightly handicapped by their lifestyle: Couples spend time apart and with other people, and we deal with public scrutiny. It’s hard.”

How Ryan would ditch a bad date:

“If you’re not laughing and mentally stimulating the other person, there’s nowhere to go. You can resuscitate it by drinking. I always have the perfect excuse: ‘I have to put the kids to bed.’”

His little-known talent:

“I rap really well. I can sound like Lil Wayne or Ludacris. I’m dead serious…I can spit!”

His obsession: